Moonkey's Lafe

I wisht fother kuld stay home with me so I ken not be so alone. I wuld lake to go to the perk and sketch. I wisht MINE family kuld bring me liverwurst, frosty paws. i wisht i kuld have a dag party at the hotel but nobady ken throw it wan panky is busy and fother is working. it is sad.

this is the first email that they have sented about me while i weighted at marge's house lake a homeless hobo. I feel rother insulted lake I kennot go to the bathroom. I have NEVER gone to the bathroom on nobady's flor. I am NOT wan chiwawa. March 24, 2008  show mom out little button. we'll prbly get to see him this coming weekend. how do we potty train him? online it says try the crate method or soemthing. his profile doesnt say he's toilet trained so that's why we're wondering. profiles on chihuahuas say they're ahrd to toilet train.

I lake this look. However, I hate hats and glasses and jewels. They are tarrbil to wair.

watcht MINE mouth and turned up the volume. I have bellows mouth.

Yesterdate mather and fother spoke. they sed: "i ken beleeve he (me) is vairy happy in his (MINE) lafe." it is true. I live in tha gratest country in the wurld. You ken sit in the window. You ken lay in a sunpatch. You ken play in the snew. You ken rustle leafs. You ken buy stella & chewseys. You ken go to tha beech. You ken look at dags fram the window. You ken go to riverside and lay on the sidewok or go to tha dag perk. You ken go to central perk. You ken get treets at tha dag stores. You ken go to irving kofi and go crumbing. You ken go to tha hotel. You ken have menny gurlfrends. This is a grate lafe in a grate country on earth. Tha End!

I almost died yesterday becawse the askhold downstares left her gas stove on for menny hours. The fire department without the dag came. Then the gas people came. Then they digged MINE street. Wot a lowd date we had after such a peecefull perk. Last sunset, I had wan perk date with Panky. She is missing her "sister" Choola who has gone home to Seewassan, Vancouver. Choola has a wanderfull back yard and neighbour. However, Choola might come back in August. I had to reassure Panky. "Don't worry Panky. Choola will come back." Todate I will be forced outside vairy irly becawse we can have 100 degrees and humidity vairy irly on. Good Lard. I won't have a perk (Riverside) date with fother to practise sketching todate! Fother sed everybady laffed becawse i made a nest on the sidewalk NOT on the grass yesterdate at sketching time. They kennot understand I lake to avoid fleez. Do NOT call mather. Her fone is krazy now. How many times did you enjoy mine fotos...

I wuld lake frosty paws. you ken see how much dags ken lake it. http://www.target.com/p/frosty-paws-original-4-pack/-/A-14936898

https://plus.google.com/u/0/photos/103678270241062789082/albums/5811061309960259249?authkey=CLTHy8vLpIa9pwE

For mine container for foods and waters.

Todate mather sed "He looks lake heatstroke." I ken tell you I felt lake hot for too long. This brings MINE thoughts to MINE birthdate. what do i want? i want kwebec dag ice screem cake. This is cool and tasty. I would lake "DR> BEcker's bites". I wuld lake to eet menny foods all date on that birthdate.

You Ken feel tall whan you pee on tha branches.

Last night I threwed up suddenly in MINE bed fram street foods. Then fother and I stripped MINE bed and fother washed it. I thought "wairever should i sleep?" Nobady cared. Mather was sleeping. Fother sed it is too bad becawse now it has to dry. Insted of sleeping on MINE sofa and duvet, I climbed into bed on mather's legs. That felt nice for a change. We spent speshul sleep bonding together. ninjoke, kennot you beleeve just 9 days ago we were playing on the welcome mat? wot a time it was! amo, kennot you remember how i sat gently beside you and licked your arm gently. how grate and speshul is it? i am on a diet so plees don't expect me to be happy. i am week and starving.

Lake I have used it is too hot to blag.

I believe MINE tale has gotten too big four MINE britches and MIND bed. However, i will continue to rest lake this until the spirit moves me to move. Tha End!

Thair is a kanine flu spreading around america (tha gratest cuntry in the wurld). Maybe this si why i ken feel so tired and want to sleep. Yesterdate while i was napping mather yelled, "kill him!" I thought: "Mine lafe is over. she has snapped just lake wanjoke, the lettle askhole. However, she killt wan roach then felt lake a monster. i wuld lake to ask: "Pleez don't yell whenever wairever i am napping and tired." Amo, ken you feel better? Wuld you lake pampkin and sardines?

How lavely.

I have mist you and i ken lave you. Did you see that it is raining hear? Amo, I have sneezed and it felt lake MINE hole body exploded. I am "sorry" you have a sneexing kold. Tarrible. Wanjoke, Tina Fey wrote this and mather sed "This is gud." So my unsolicited advice to women in the workplace is this. When faced with sexism or ageism or lookism or even really aggressive Buddhism, ask yourself the following question: "Is this person in between me and what I want to do?" If the answer is no, ignore it and move on. Your energy is better used doing your work, and outpacing people that way. Then, when you're in charge, don't hire the people who were jerky to you. If the answer is yes, you have a more difficult road ahead of you. I suggest you model your strategy after the old Sesame Street film piece "Over! Under! Through!" (If you're under forty you might not remember this film. It taught the concepts of "over, ...

Pleez feel better. I wuld lake to sit next to you and enjoy licking your sweet and salty arm a bit. Ken we have some pets agin soon? Lave, tha sweet jardoon

Mine deerly ladies, I have come home. i had guarded the sweetcase while i weighted for papa. I had taken three hours by bus, air train, subway and car to get home. Then I had lerned papa removed the foam fram MINE bed. He had put that lavely wool pillo inside fram wanjoke. DO you remamber? It is flat and maid fram wool. Mather sed "No HE KENNOT! it is a good pillo and he will ruin it." now i am sunk vairy low into MINE bed. However, wan you are tired it doesn't matter. Thank you four inviting me and giving me pets, pampkin, magpie foods and every bed. I ken misst you on the airplane. Lave, jodarn

Mine gods how we laffed.It was too silly, too hot, too "cute" and too fun.